When you knew that your crush has a boyfriend, it’s one of the most painful things that you’ll ever feel. I also felt that and it’s very hard to deal with. Even though you aren’t serious about your crush, our hearts could still feel an ache if we know they’re in a relationship.
You might even wish that your crush will leave their boyfriend for you, but of course, it doesn’t happen all the time. I know it’s just so discouraging when you have a crush on someone and you don’t receive the same feelings. You keep on hoping that one day your crush would also entertain you.
Well, before you lose your damn mind, there are things you can do if you know that your crush has a boyfriend. This is the best advice that I can give you and I hope you would follow it.
1. Learn How To Move On
Simple, but straight to the point. You need to learn how to move on because there are things that aren’t meant for you. Getting hurt because you knew that your crush has a boyfriend is normal, your ability to feel pain is one thing that connects us, humans. What separates you is how you deal with that pain.
To learn how to move on, you need to talk to yourself if you are willing to move forward or just stuck with your position. You need to help yourself to reframe your thoughts and have a positive mantra.
When I knew that my crush has a boyfriend, I was so willing to move on that time and I planned to create a physical distance with my crush. We were somehow acquainted that’s why it’s quite painful when I knew that she’s in a relationship already.
It’s not uncommon to hear someone that they would like to distance themselves from their crush because they seriously want to move on already. I’ve heard it many times with my friends. It’s the best way to let go of our feelings for them.
Read More: How Does My Crush Like Me: 12 Ways
2. Focus On Yourself
When we are talking about focusing on yourself, it means you need to have self-care practices. Some people were so obsessed with their crush and they forget to consider their own needs already.
In the past, one of my close friends told me that he gave everything for her crush but one day he knew that her long-time crush has a boyfriend already. For months he was in pain and he was looking for ways on how he can focus on self-improvement.
He just wants to figure out where to start again. Now, he is very happy because he knows how to set healthy boundaries for others and himself.
Focusing on yourself is not selfish, it’s the best thing you can do in your life if you want to grow. You will struggle from the start because for weeks or months your mind was trained to focus on your crush. It can be frustrating knowing you give all your time to them.
But remember that life is a journey, if you are willing to focus on yourself, there is a process that you need to take. Enjoy the little steps of the process. Someday, you will realize that it feels great when you do something great for yourself.
3. Don’t Plan to Seduce Your Crush
If you are planning to seduce your crush knowing that they have a boyfriend, you’re doing the wrong thing. I will never suggest that you do this. It’s okay if you have a crush, but you need to respect them if they’re in a relationship.
You don’t have the right to destroy their relationship just because you’re jealous. Always remember that Karma is real, try to imagine if your partner is being seduced by someone. You know that what goes around comes around so you better stop if you’re planning to do this.
It might be more productive if you focus on yourself rather than forcing things that are not meant for you. Even if you know that your crush is unhappy with his boyfriend, you still don’t have the right to seduce them. You need to wait until they’re single and court them in the right manner.
4. Stop Your Social Media Stalking
If you already created a physical distancing with your crush but you still keep stalking them on social media, it will be useless. You will still feel sadness if you keep seeing your crush’s Facebook posts, stories, and status.
It will be more painful if you saw one of their post with his new boyfriend. I would suggest that you cut your digital connections with them. You don’t need to block or unfriend them, maybe a mute or unfollow would be fine.
I know how it feels when you go to your bed every night scrolling through Facebook or Instagram then you are all over their posts, it’s very painful. All you can do is accept everything and be happy for them.
If it’s still difficult for you because you can still see your crush in some tagged pictures, maybe you can spend less time on social media by deleting the application. You need to beat the bad habit of stalking them and the best way to do it is by deleting the app. When you get back to social media, you need to move forward with a new mindset.
Read More: Does Crush Mean Love?
5. Look for Activities to Distract Yourself
When I was moving on with my crush, I learned that there was no magic potion that you can take to quickly forget them. The best strategy that I’ve learned is to look for activities just to distract myself.
What I did was go to the gym, playing sports that were unfamiliar to me, and learned how to hike with my friends. You need to do different activities to forget the feelings that you have with your crush.
You can also let your friends distract you from that painful feeling. Your friends can enhance your feelings and make you feel less lonely. Avoid isolating yourself as it won’t help you.
If you want your healing process to be shorter, finding new passion is one of the best things you can do. There are a lot of ways you can divert your attention. When you’re already having fun with your new hobby, you will realize that having a crush was just a temporary feeling.
6. Don’t Wait for Them to Breakup
I wouldn’t suggest that you will wait for them to break up because you will never know if there’s a chance that they’re going to end or not. I know that there are people who are willing to wait, there’s nothing wrong with that.
But there’s a chance that you will be confused with your feelings if you keep on waiting. You are also missing out on someone more compatible with you. Why not wait at the same time you’re entertaining others? It’s fine because you’re not in a committed relationship.
I want you to realize that there’s no guarantee that you’ll be together even if they break up. Chances are high that things won’t turn your way.
This is just my advice, you will still have the final decision if you’re going to wait or not. I’m just concerned because it is less risky if you’re going to look for a new crush rather than waiting with no assurance.